Jul
Why Women Are Better Than Computers
Well, happy July 4th to my US readers! Independence day is it? I don’t think any of you will be independent for much longer, what with the new 2257 porn law and other matters – but I will write more on that soon.
Here in the UK it’s a damp squib of a day. Wimbledon’s over, so no more cute babes serving up the tennis balls and showing flashes of underwear (and darn those spoilsports who wear shorts under their skirts!). Neighbours is back on at least, and there’s some cute pretty girls in that. Anyway, the damp weather means its ideal for staying in and thinking about beautiful girls, and continuing to weave my thread of thought on the comparisons that have been erroneously made between women and computers. Today I’m looking at:
3. The native language used to communicate with other computers
is incomprehensible to everyone else.
Now first of all, take a look at these girls: Destin, Dreamy Danica, Perfect Paz, Sweet Serena, Cute Courtney and that delightfully effervescent teen beauty girl, whom I love with every fibre of my being, Bashful Brittany
OK, so you’ve looked at them. Maybe you got a little hot looking at them? That’s OK, you’re meant too – if you didn’t, you might need to be reading about beautiful men instead. Ok, now imagine them all in a room, conversing with each other, the unbearable lightness and cadences their breath makes as it forms language, the idiosyncratic idiom of their feminine conversation brightening the ambience of the room where they sit in all their natural beauty. We may not understand all of it, but that chit-chat, those silly giggles, the exlamation points of their punctuation (and their breasts), all conspire to produce a work of audio complexity that Mozart might have plucked out of the air. I love the sound of girl’s light voices, even down to their glottal stops. Do I care what they are saying, really, when they converse with their counterparts? Do I care that it is more or less incomprehensible to me and would seem in some ways to be an exclusive code? No. All I care about is that the sounds are being made by beautiful pink coral lips, the flute mouthpiece of their being…
Shit, I waxed a little poetic there, so now imagine a black DOS screen churning out a series of one’s and zeros! Or perhaps even those immortal lines “Abort, Retry, Fail?” Think of the endless syntax of the internet, the http proxies and dns servers, the clicks and ticks that make up cyberspace. As L. Andersen said, language is a virus, and this appears to be more true than ever in the age of mass communication.
But also, as Morrissey wrote, “nature is a language, can’t you read?” The language of beauty, fortunately, requires no translation. When a pretty girl moans sweet nothings into your ear, the meaning is fluid and pleasurable, the passing of warm breath across your skin, the transmission of desire, and the awakening of joy…
Now if you get turned on by the ticks and clicks, whirrs and grrrs of a computer, there might be some truth in the original author’s assertion that computers and women share similar means of incomprehensible communication. But I for one would rather listen the girls’ laughter and chitchat than the workings of a computer – anyday!
Try looking at these girls, and maybe you’ll discover a whole new language!
Brittany Blue, Candi Moore, Cris Taliana, Beautiful Blonde Dixon, Piper, Lucy, Amy, Karen Dreams and of course Tiffany Teen and Skye Model
